Mon 14 Jan 2008
Advent Calendar Post Apocalypse
Posted by laup under Meditations, Outbreak, Random Encounters, Weirdie
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As I mentioned earlier, I encountered an advent calendar with some issues I found disturbing. Well hey, the unpredictability continued and I recorded the results. I don’t know what to make of it other than a mistake in the printing process, which is the likely explanation. If I take it as a meaningful coincidence, then I chose it out of the large pile of calendars because it belonged to me. The calendar of mismatched pictures in need of a person capable of unlocking their secrets. And so I shall! The time has come to make sense of the senseless jumble before me!
Dec 11
Picture: Scary snowman smoking a pipe, with branches for arms
Candy: What look like a pair of boots from the eighties
Meaning: To stay ahead of the evil snowman, use the moonwalk boots
Dec 12
Picture: A pair of ice skates
Candy: A snare drum with drumsticks
Meaning: Use the skates to cross the frozen lake, then play the drum to crack the ice
Dec 13
Picture: A present tied with twine
Candy: A sleigh with three presents in the back
Meaning: The present is a trap! Steal the sleigh and the three wise men’s stuff instead
Dec 14
Picture: A field of stars
Candy: A glob with a halo and wings
Meaning: Don’t look at the night sky, or an alien will appear and kidnap you
Dec 15
Picture: Sleigh
Candy: Basket of daffodils
Meaning: Ditch the sleigh at the greenhouse and pick some flowers
Dec 16
Picture: Four lit candles of various sizes
Candy: Wreath of mistletoe with candle in center
Meaning: Put the smallest candle in the wreath to open the wise men’s presents safely
Dec 17
Picture: A child’s wooden sled
Candy: A toy choo-choo train engine
Meaning: The train is useless. Put the gold, frankincense, and myrrh on the sled and drag it behind you.
Dec 18
Picture: A house surrounded by snow
Candy: A boot with a buckle around the ankle
Meaning: Break into Santa’s house and steal one of his boots
Dec 19
Picture: Plate of food, maybe a loaf of bread
Candy: Teddy bear
Meaning: Feed the ravenous bear with the food Mrs. Santa left in the kitchen for her husband
Dec 20
Picture: Two dolls
Candy: Six pointed star
Meaning: Give the dolls the daffodils and they will give you the six pointed star
Dec 21
Picture: A roll of ribbon
Candy: A lantern
Meaning: The lantern is set to explode, take the ribbon in case you need to tie up somebody
Dec 22
Picture: A pile of candy, including lollipops and wrapped sweets
Candy: A mushroom (???)
Meaning: The candy is deadly poison. Eat the mushroom instead to gain an extra life
Dec 23
Picture: The eighties boots, confirming that my identification of Dec 11th’s candy was correct
Candy: A sleeping crescent moon with a nightcap on it
Meaning: Leave the moonwalk boots with the moon. When the moon wakes up, it’ll eat the evil snowman
Dec 24
Picture: A valentine heart with a lit candle sticking out the top (That is so lewd as far as symbols go, I’m taken aback)
Candy: Messed up gremlin looking Santa Claus (K’s own words, as I had no clue)
Meaning: Oh no, Santa Claws has come to get you! He’s a little slow if you took his boot, so use the valentine’s heart from Dec 7 and the second shortest candle to destroy him with the power of love!
So, if I have this right, Christmas is a time of overcoming life-threatening obstacles and gathering the right quest objects to defeat the monsters. I suppose that’s my Xmas experience in a nutshell. This advent calendar was pretty cool now that I think about it. It showed me some weird stuff relevant to my own inner process. I guess we get gifts relevant to our situation if we remain open to the possibility.
Which begs the question, what strange and wonderful things might you run into or pick up by “accident” or “design”? What does that reveal about yourself?
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